I receive a small amount of spam on a weekly basis. Most of them are pretty similar and fall into two primary groups:

1) Link lists that aren’t really pretending to be anything other than spam.

2) Poorly translated generic praise with a spammy website link in the name.

But on Tuesday I received my first ever insult spam:

The next time I learn a weblog, I hope that it doesnt disappoint me as a lot as this one. I mean, I know it was my option to learn, but I really thought youd have one thing attention-grabbing to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about something that you would repair in the event you werent too busy on the lookout for attention.

Ok, exactly what is the theory behind this kind of spam? Are you hoping that whomever doesn’t like my blog would come here, see that you also don’t agree with my blog and click the link in your name? That’s sort of like advertising your Anti-Walmart campaign in the back of the store by the restrooms. Odds are if the person is already IN the Walmart and shopping, they probably aren’t about to agree with you; though if the stalls are out of toilet paper I’m sure people would appreciate receiving your pamphlets. Similarly, it would be just as foolish to run your Republican slash campaign on Fox News, or your Democratic slash campaign on CNN.

Granted, for most blog posts (mine included) the spam would be fairly accurate. There is a lot of whining and attention mongering (guilty as charged… PAY ATTENTION TO ME, I’M AWESOME DAMNIT!!). However, this particular spam was posted to one of my Monday’s Game segments, which makes it woefully obvious as a spam comment (well that and the link in the name being for a notorious Chinese scam site… and the Engrish).

So for any budding spambot designers out there, here’s a tip: mean spam messages are even less effective than the already hugely ineffective praise spam. Not only does the spam filter ALSO recognize mean spam as being spam, but a particularly vain blogger will probably delete any mean or critical comments they receive. Plus, anyone who reads a blog regularly probably agrees with the blogger at some level or another, so mean spam is more likely to be ignored by the daily haunts. Thus the mean spam has an additional two levels of filtration it has to penetrate in order to be even as ineffective as the praise spam. Seems rather a counter-intuitive way to try to advertise now, doesn’t it?

-Confusion is a state of mind, or is it?